Dreadful Young Ladies and Other Stories

Dreadful Young Ladies and Other Stories

Author: Kelly Barnhill

Publisher: Algonquin Books

Published: 2018-02-20

Total Pages: 305

ISBN-13: 1616207973

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

When Mrs. Sorensen’s husband dies, she rekindles a long-dormant love with an unsuitable mate in “Mrs. Sorensen and the Sasquatch.” In “Open the Door and the Light Pours Through,” a young man wrestles with grief and his sexuality in an exchange of letters with his faraway beloved. “Dreadful Young Ladies” demonstrates the strength and power—known and unknown—of the imagination. In “Notes on the Untimely Death of Ronia Drake,” a witch is haunted by the deadly repercussions of a spell. “The Insect and the Astronomer” upends expectations about good and bad, knowledge and ignorance, love and longing. The World Fantasy Award–winning novella “The Unlicensed Magician” introduces the secret magical life of an invisible girl once left for dead—with thematic echoes of Barnhill’s Newbery Medal–winning novel, The Girl Who Drank the Moon. With bold, reality-bending invention underscored by richly illuminated universal themes of love, death, jealousy, and hope, the stories in Dreadful Young Ladies show why its author has been hailed as “a fantasist on the order of Neil Gaiman” (Minneapolis Star Tribune). This collection cements Barnhill’s place as one of the wittiest, most vital and compelling voices in contemporary literature.


Book Synopsis Dreadful Young Ladies and Other Stories by : Kelly Barnhill

Download or read book Dreadful Young Ladies and Other Stories written by Kelly Barnhill and published by Algonquin Books. This book was released on 2018-02-20 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Mrs. Sorensen’s husband dies, she rekindles a long-dormant love with an unsuitable mate in “Mrs. Sorensen and the Sasquatch.” In “Open the Door and the Light Pours Through,” a young man wrestles with grief and his sexuality in an exchange of letters with his faraway beloved. “Dreadful Young Ladies” demonstrates the strength and power—known and unknown—of the imagination. In “Notes on the Untimely Death of Ronia Drake,” a witch is haunted by the deadly repercussions of a spell. “The Insect and the Astronomer” upends expectations about good and bad, knowledge and ignorance, love and longing. The World Fantasy Award–winning novella “The Unlicensed Magician” introduces the secret magical life of an invisible girl once left for dead—with thematic echoes of Barnhill’s Newbery Medal–winning novel, The Girl Who Drank the Moon. With bold, reality-bending invention underscored by richly illuminated universal themes of love, death, jealousy, and hope, the stories in Dreadful Young Ladies show why its author has been hailed as “a fantasist on the order of Neil Gaiman” (Minneapolis Star Tribune). This collection cements Barnhill’s place as one of the wittiest, most vital and compelling voices in contemporary literature.


Iron Hearted Violet

Iron Hearted Violet

Author: Kelly Barnhill

Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

Published: 2012-10-09

Total Pages: 272

ISBN-13: 0316215589

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Newbery Medal winner Kelly Barnhill spins a wondrously different kind of fairy-tale: In most fairy tales, princesses are beautiful, dragons are terrifying, and stories are harmless. But this isn't most fairy tales... Princess Violet is plain, reckless, and quite possibly too clever for her own good. Particularly when it comes to telling stories. One day she and her best friend, Demetrius, stumble upon a hidden room and find a peculiar book. A forbidden book. It tells a story of an evil being, called the Nybbas, imprisoned in their world. The story cannot be true--not really. But then the whispers start. Violet and Demetrius, along with an ancient, scarred dragon-the last dragon in existence, in fact-may hold the key to the Nybbas's triumph or its demise. It all depends on how they tell the story. After all, stories make their own rules. Iron Hearted Violet is a story about the power of stories, our belief in them, and how one enchanted tale changed the course of an entire kingdom. A 2012 Andre Norton Award Finalist A Parents' Choice Gold Award Winner


Book Synopsis Iron Hearted Violet by : Kelly Barnhill

Download or read book Iron Hearted Violet written by Kelly Barnhill and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2012-10-09 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Newbery Medal winner Kelly Barnhill spins a wondrously different kind of fairy-tale: In most fairy tales, princesses are beautiful, dragons are terrifying, and stories are harmless. But this isn't most fairy tales... Princess Violet is plain, reckless, and quite possibly too clever for her own good. Particularly when it comes to telling stories. One day she and her best friend, Demetrius, stumble upon a hidden room and find a peculiar book. A forbidden book. It tells a story of an evil being, called the Nybbas, imprisoned in their world. The story cannot be true--not really. But then the whispers start. Violet and Demetrius, along with an ancient, scarred dragon-the last dragon in existence, in fact-may hold the key to the Nybbas's triumph or its demise. It all depends on how they tell the story. After all, stories make their own rules. Iron Hearted Violet is a story about the power of stories, our belief in them, and how one enchanted tale changed the course of an entire kingdom. A 2012 Andre Norton Award Finalist A Parents' Choice Gold Award Winner


The Mostly True Story of Jack

The Mostly True Story of Jack

Author: Kelly Barnhill

Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

Published: 2011-08-02

Total Pages: 336

ISBN-13: 0316175234

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Newbery Medal-winner Kelly Barnhill's debut novel is an eerie tale of magic, friendship, and sacrifice. Enter a world where magic bubbles just below the surface. . . . When Jack is sent to Hazelwood, Iowa, to live with his strange aunt and uncle, he expects a summer of boredom. Little does he know that the people of Hazelwood have been waiting for him for quite a long time. When he arrives, he begins to make actual friends for the first time in his life-but the town bully beats him up and the richest man in town begins to plot Jack's imminent, and hopefully painful, demise. It's up to Jack to figure out why suddenly everyone cares so much about him. Back home he was practically... invisible. The Mostly True Story of Jack is a stunning debut novel about things broken, things put back together, and finding a place to belong. "There's a dry wit and playfulness to Barnhill's writing that recalls Lemony Snicket and Blue Balliett...a delightfully unusual gem." --Los Angeles Times


Book Synopsis The Mostly True Story of Jack by : Kelly Barnhill

Download or read book The Mostly True Story of Jack written by Kelly Barnhill and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2011-08-02 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Newbery Medal-winner Kelly Barnhill's debut novel is an eerie tale of magic, friendship, and sacrifice. Enter a world where magic bubbles just below the surface. . . . When Jack is sent to Hazelwood, Iowa, to live with his strange aunt and uncle, he expects a summer of boredom. Little does he know that the people of Hazelwood have been waiting for him for quite a long time. When he arrives, he begins to make actual friends for the first time in his life-but the town bully beats him up and the richest man in town begins to plot Jack's imminent, and hopefully painful, demise. It's up to Jack to figure out why suddenly everyone cares so much about him. Back home he was practically... invisible. The Mostly True Story of Jack is a stunning debut novel about things broken, things put back together, and finding a place to belong. "There's a dry wit and playfulness to Barnhill's writing that recalls Lemony Snicket and Blue Balliett...a delightfully unusual gem." --Los Angeles Times


When Women Were Dragons

When Women Were Dragons

Author: Kelly Barnhill

Publisher: Anchor

Published: 2022-05-03

Total Pages: 374

ISBN-13: 0385548230

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

A GOODREADS BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR • A fiery feminist fantasy tale set in 1950s America where thousands of women have spontaneously transformed into dragons, exploding notions of a woman’s place in the world and expanding minds about accepting others for who they really are. "Ferociously imagined…and as exhilarating as a ride on dragonback." —Lev Grossman, bestselling author of The Magicians Trilogy "Completely fierce, unmistakably feminist, and subversively funny." —Bonnie Garmus, bestselling author of Lessons in Chemistry In the first adult novel by the New York Times bestselling author of The Ogress and The Orphans, Alex Green is a young girl in a world much like ours, except for its most seminal event: the Mass Dragoning of 1955, when hundreds of thousands of ordinary wives and mothers sprouted wings, scales, and talons; left a trail of fiery destruction in their path; and took to the skies. Was it their choice? What will become of those left behind? Why did Alex’s beloved aunt Marla transform but her mother did not? Alex doesn’t know. It’s taboo to speak of. Forced into silence, Alex nevertheless must face the consequences of this astonishing event: a mother more protective than ever; an absentee father; the upsetting insistence that her aunt never even existed; and watching her beloved cousin Bea become dangerously obsessed with the forbidden. In this timely and timeless speculative novel, award-winning author Kelly Barnhill boldly explores rage, memory, and the tyranny of forced limitations. When Women Were Dragons exposes a world that wants to keep women small—their lives and their prospects—and examines what happens when they rise en masse and take up the space they deserve.


Book Synopsis When Women Were Dragons by : Kelly Barnhill

Download or read book When Women Were Dragons written by Kelly Barnhill and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2022-05-03 with total page 374 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A GOODREADS BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR • A fiery feminist fantasy tale set in 1950s America where thousands of women have spontaneously transformed into dragons, exploding notions of a woman’s place in the world and expanding minds about accepting others for who they really are. "Ferociously imagined…and as exhilarating as a ride on dragonback." —Lev Grossman, bestselling author of The Magicians Trilogy "Completely fierce, unmistakably feminist, and subversively funny." —Bonnie Garmus, bestselling author of Lessons in Chemistry In the first adult novel by the New York Times bestselling author of The Ogress and The Orphans, Alex Green is a young girl in a world much like ours, except for its most seminal event: the Mass Dragoning of 1955, when hundreds of thousands of ordinary wives and mothers sprouted wings, scales, and talons; left a trail of fiery destruction in their path; and took to the skies. Was it their choice? What will become of those left behind? Why did Alex’s beloved aunt Marla transform but her mother did not? Alex doesn’t know. It’s taboo to speak of. Forced into silence, Alex nevertheless must face the consequences of this astonishing event: a mother more protective than ever; an absentee father; the upsetting insistence that her aunt never even existed; and watching her beloved cousin Bea become dangerously obsessed with the forbidden. In this timely and timeless speculative novel, award-winning author Kelly Barnhill boldly explores rage, memory, and the tyranny of forced limitations. When Women Were Dragons exposes a world that wants to keep women small—their lives and their prospects—and examines what happens when they rise en masse and take up the space they deserve.


The Witch's Boy

The Witch's Boy

Author: Kelly Barnhill

Publisher: Algonquin Young Readers

Published: 2014-09-16

Total Pages: 561

ISBN-13: 1616204338

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

“This spellbinding fantasy begs for a cozy chair and several hours of uninterrupted reading time.” —The Washington Post When Ned and his identical twin brother tumble from their raft into a raging river, only Ned survives. Villagers are convinced the wrong boy lived. Across the forest that borders Ned’s village, Áine, the daughter of the Bandit King, is haunted by her mother’s last words: “The wrong boy will save your life, and you will save his.” When the Bandit King comes to steal the magic Ned’s mother, a witch, is meant to protect, Áine and Ned meet. Can they trust each other long enough to cross a dangerous enchanted forest and stop the war about to boil over between their two kingdoms? “Barnhill is a fantasist on the order of Neil Gaiman.” —Minneapolis Star Tribune “[The Witch’s Boy] should open young readers’ eyes to something that is all around them in the very world we live in: the magic of words.” —The New York Times “This is a book to treasure.” —Nerdy Book Club A Washington Post Best Book of 2014 A Publishers Weekly Best Book of 2014 A Kirkus Reviews Best Children’s Book of 2014 A Chicago Public Library “Best of the Best” 2014


Book Synopsis The Witch's Boy by : Kelly Barnhill

Download or read book The Witch's Boy written by Kelly Barnhill and published by Algonquin Young Readers. This book was released on 2014-09-16 with total page 561 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “This spellbinding fantasy begs for a cozy chair and several hours of uninterrupted reading time.” —The Washington Post When Ned and his identical twin brother tumble from their raft into a raging river, only Ned survives. Villagers are convinced the wrong boy lived. Across the forest that borders Ned’s village, Áine, the daughter of the Bandit King, is haunted by her mother’s last words: “The wrong boy will save your life, and you will save his.” When the Bandit King comes to steal the magic Ned’s mother, a witch, is meant to protect, Áine and Ned meet. Can they trust each other long enough to cross a dangerous enchanted forest and stop the war about to boil over between their two kingdoms? “Barnhill is a fantasist on the order of Neil Gaiman.” —Minneapolis Star Tribune “[The Witch’s Boy] should open young readers’ eyes to something that is all around them in the very world we live in: the magic of words.” —The New York Times “This is a book to treasure.” —Nerdy Book Club A Washington Post Best Book of 2014 A Publishers Weekly Best Book of 2014 A Kirkus Reviews Best Children’s Book of 2014 A Chicago Public Library “Best of the Best” 2014


The Unlicensed Magician

The Unlicensed Magician

Author: Kelly Regan Barnhill

Publisher:

Published: 2015

Total Pages: 123

ISBN-13: 9781848639195

DOWNLOAD EBOOK


Book Synopsis The Unlicensed Magician by : Kelly Regan Barnhill

Download or read book The Unlicensed Magician written by Kelly Regan Barnhill and published by . This book was released on 2015 with total page 123 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:


Cesare

Cesare

Author: Jerome Charyn

Publisher: Bellevue Literary Press

Published: 2020-01-07

Total Pages: 241

ISBN-13: 1942658516

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

A spy navigates the labyrinthine horrors of Nazi Germany, on a mission to save the woman he loves “Charyn’s blunt, brilliantly crafted prose bubbles with the pleasure of nailing life to the page in just the right words. . . . [Cesare is] provocative, stimulating and deeply satisfying.” —Washington Post On a windy night in 1937, a seventeen-year-old German naval sub-cadet is wandering along the seawall when he stumbles upon a gang of ruffians beating up a tramp, whose life he saves. The man is none other than spymaster Wilhelm Canaris, chief of the Abwehr, German military intelligence. Canaris adopts the young man and dubs him “Cesare” after the character in the silent film The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari for his ability to break through any barrier as he eliminates the Abwehr’s enemies. Canaris is a man of contradictions who, while serving the regime, seeks to undermine the Nazis and helps Cesare hide Berlin’s Jews from the Gestapo. But the Nazis will lure many to Theresienstadt, a phony paradise in Czechoslovakia with sham restaurants, novelty shops, and bakeries, a cruel ghetto and way station to Auschwitz. When the woman Cesare loves, a member of the Jewish underground, is captured and sent there, Cesare must find a way to rescue her. Cesare is a literary thriller and a love story born of the horrors of a country whose culture has died, whose history has been warped, and whose soul has disappeared. Jerome Charyn is the author of more than fifty works of fiction and nonfiction. Among other honors, he has received the Rosenthal Family Foundation Award for Fiction from the American Academy of Arts and Letters and his novels have been selected as finalists for the Firecracker Award and PEN/Faulkner Award for Fiction. Charyn lives in New York.


Book Synopsis Cesare by : Jerome Charyn

Download or read book Cesare written by Jerome Charyn and published by Bellevue Literary Press. This book was released on 2020-01-07 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A spy navigates the labyrinthine horrors of Nazi Germany, on a mission to save the woman he loves “Charyn’s blunt, brilliantly crafted prose bubbles with the pleasure of nailing life to the page in just the right words. . . . [Cesare is] provocative, stimulating and deeply satisfying.” —Washington Post On a windy night in 1937, a seventeen-year-old German naval sub-cadet is wandering along the seawall when he stumbles upon a gang of ruffians beating up a tramp, whose life he saves. The man is none other than spymaster Wilhelm Canaris, chief of the Abwehr, German military intelligence. Canaris adopts the young man and dubs him “Cesare” after the character in the silent film The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari for his ability to break through any barrier as he eliminates the Abwehr’s enemies. Canaris is a man of contradictions who, while serving the regime, seeks to undermine the Nazis and helps Cesare hide Berlin’s Jews from the Gestapo. But the Nazis will lure many to Theresienstadt, a phony paradise in Czechoslovakia with sham restaurants, novelty shops, and bakeries, a cruel ghetto and way station to Auschwitz. When the woman Cesare loves, a member of the Jewish underground, is captured and sent there, Cesare must find a way to rescue her. Cesare is a literary thriller and a love story born of the horrors of a country whose culture has died, whose history has been warped, and whose soul has disappeared. Jerome Charyn is the author of more than fifty works of fiction and nonfiction. Among other honors, he has received the Rosenthal Family Foundation Award for Fiction from the American Academy of Arts and Letters and his novels have been selected as finalists for the Firecracker Award and PEN/Faulkner Award for Fiction. Charyn lives in New York.


A Wrinkle in Time

A Wrinkle in Time

Author: Madeleine L'Engle

Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR)

Published: 2010-04-01

Total Pages: 260

ISBN-13: 1429915641

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

NEWBERY MEDAL WINNER • TIME MAGAZINE’S 100 BEST FANTASY BOOKS OF ALL TIME • NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE FROM DISNEY Read the ground-breaking science fiction and fantasy classic that has delighted children for over 60 years! "A Wrinkle in Time is one of my favorite books of all time. I've read it so often, I know it by heart." —Meg Cabot Late one night, three otherworldly creatures appear and sweep Meg Murry, her brother Charles Wallace, and their friend Calvin O'Keefe away on a mission to save Mr. Murray, who has gone missing while doing top-secret work for the government. They travel via tesseract--a wrinkle that transports one across space and time--to the planet Camazotz, where Mr. Murray is being held captive. There they discover a dark force that threatens not only Mr. Murray but the safety of the whole universe. A Wrinkle in Time is the first book in Madeleine L’Engle’s Time Quintet.


Book Synopsis A Wrinkle in Time by : Madeleine L'Engle

Download or read book A Wrinkle in Time written by Madeleine L'Engle and published by Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR). This book was released on 2010-04-01 with total page 260 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEWBERY MEDAL WINNER • TIME MAGAZINE’S 100 BEST FANTASY BOOKS OF ALL TIME • NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE FROM DISNEY Read the ground-breaking science fiction and fantasy classic that has delighted children for over 60 years! "A Wrinkle in Time is one of my favorite books of all time. I've read it so often, I know it by heart." —Meg Cabot Late one night, three otherworldly creatures appear and sweep Meg Murry, her brother Charles Wallace, and their friend Calvin O'Keefe away on a mission to save Mr. Murray, who has gone missing while doing top-secret work for the government. They travel via tesseract--a wrinkle that transports one across space and time--to the planet Camazotz, where Mr. Murray is being held captive. There they discover a dark force that threatens not only Mr. Murray but the safety of the whole universe. A Wrinkle in Time is the first book in Madeleine L’Engle’s Time Quintet.


Damsel

Damsel

Author: Elana K. Arnold

Publisher: HarperCollins

Published: 2018-10-02

Total Pages: 320

ISBN-13: 0062742345

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

*A 2019 Michael L. Printz Award Honor Book* A dark, twisted, unforgettable fairy tale from Elana K. Arnold, author of the National Book Award finalist What Girls Are Made Of The rite has existed for as long as anyone can remember: When the king dies, his son the prince must venture out into the gray lands, slay a fierce dragon, and rescue a damsel to be his bride. This is the way things have always been. When Ama wakes in the arms of Prince Emory, she knows none of this. She has no memory of what came before she was captured by the dragon or what horrors she faced in its lair. She knows only this handsome young man, the story he tells of her rescue, and her destiny of sitting on a throne beside him. It’s all like a dream, like something from a fairy tale. As Ama follows Emory to the kingdom of Harding, however, she discovers that not all is as it seems. There is more to the legends of the dragons and the damsels than anyone knows, and the greatest threats may not be behind her, but around her, now, and closing in.


Book Synopsis Damsel by : Elana K. Arnold

Download or read book Damsel written by Elana K. Arnold and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2018-10-02 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: *A 2019 Michael L. Printz Award Honor Book* A dark, twisted, unforgettable fairy tale from Elana K. Arnold, author of the National Book Award finalist What Girls Are Made Of The rite has existed for as long as anyone can remember: When the king dies, his son the prince must venture out into the gray lands, slay a fierce dragon, and rescue a damsel to be his bride. This is the way things have always been. When Ama wakes in the arms of Prince Emory, she knows none of this. She has no memory of what came before she was captured by the dragon or what horrors she faced in its lair. She knows only this handsome young man, the story he tells of her rescue, and her destiny of sitting on a throne beside him. It’s all like a dream, like something from a fairy tale. As Ama follows Emory to the kingdom of Harding, however, she discovers that not all is as it seems. There is more to the legends of the dragons and the damsels than anyone knows, and the greatest threats may not be behind her, but around her, now, and closing in.


The Lesser Dead

The Lesser Dead

Author: Christopher Buehlman

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2014-10-07

Total Pages: 370

ISBN-13: 0698146328

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

WINNER OF THE AMERICAN LIBRARY ASSOCIATION’S BEST HORROR NOVEL OF THE YEAR “As much F. Scott Fitzgerald as Dean Koontz” (#1 New York Times bestselling author Patricia Briggs), Christopher Buehlman excels in twisting the familiar into newfound dread in his “genre-bending” (California Literary Review) novels. Now the acclaimed author of Those Across the River delivers his most disquieting tale yet... The secret is, vampires are real and I am one. The secret is, I’m stealing from you what is most truly yours and I’m not sorry... New York City in 1978 is a dirty, dangerous place to live. And die. Joey Peacock knows this as well as anybody—he has spent the last forty years as an adolescent vampire, perfecting the routine he now enjoys: womanizing in punk clubs and discotheques, feeding by night, and sleeping by day with others of his kind in the macabre labyrinth under the city’s sidewalks. The subways are his playground and his highway, shuttling him throughout Manhattan to bleed the unsuspecting in the Sheep Meadow of Central Park or in the backseats of Checker cabs, or even those in their own apartments who are too hypnotized by sitcoms to notice him opening their windows. It’s almost too easy. Until one night he sees them hunting on his beloved subway. The children with the merry eyes. Vampires, like him…or not like him. Whatever they are, whatever their appearance means, the undead in the tunnels of Manhattan are not as safe as they once were. And neither are the rest of us.


Book Synopsis The Lesser Dead by : Christopher Buehlman

Download or read book The Lesser Dead written by Christopher Buehlman and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2014-10-07 with total page 370 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: WINNER OF THE AMERICAN LIBRARY ASSOCIATION’S BEST HORROR NOVEL OF THE YEAR “As much F. Scott Fitzgerald as Dean Koontz” (#1 New York Times bestselling author Patricia Briggs), Christopher Buehlman excels in twisting the familiar into newfound dread in his “genre-bending” (California Literary Review) novels. Now the acclaimed author of Those Across the River delivers his most disquieting tale yet... The secret is, vampires are real and I am one. The secret is, I’m stealing from you what is most truly yours and I’m not sorry... New York City in 1978 is a dirty, dangerous place to live. And die. Joey Peacock knows this as well as anybody—he has spent the last forty years as an adolescent vampire, perfecting the routine he now enjoys: womanizing in punk clubs and discotheques, feeding by night, and sleeping by day with others of his kind in the macabre labyrinth under the city’s sidewalks. The subways are his playground and his highway, shuttling him throughout Manhattan to bleed the unsuspecting in the Sheep Meadow of Central Park or in the backseats of Checker cabs, or even those in their own apartments who are too hypnotized by sitcoms to notice him opening their windows. It’s almost too easy. Until one night he sees them hunting on his beloved subway. The children with the merry eyes. Vampires, like him…or not like him. Whatever they are, whatever their appearance means, the undead in the tunnels of Manhattan are not as safe as they once were. And neither are the rest of us.