Santa Steps Out

Santa Steps Out

Author: Robert Devereaux

Publisher: Deadite Press

Published: 2011-11

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781621050131

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Sex, Death, and Santa Claus ... His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what unholy desires now propel him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before the sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten? ... She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More important, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north? ... He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and peer into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another? ... Deadite Press is proud to bring back the ultimate erotic Christmas story from Robert Devereaux


Book Synopsis Santa Steps Out by : Robert Devereaux

Download or read book Santa Steps Out written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2011-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sex, Death, and Santa Claus ... His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what unholy desires now propel him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before the sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten? ... She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More important, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north? ... He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and peer into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another? ... Deadite Press is proud to bring back the ultimate erotic Christmas story from Robert Devereaux


Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes

Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes

Author: Robert Devereaux

Publisher: Deadite Press

Published: 2011-11

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781621050148

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"I wish I could hope to ever attain one-thousandth the perversity of Robert Devereaux's toenail clippings." -Poppy Z. Brite Santa Claus is back. And flying beside him is Wendy, his freshly minted stepdaughter, who can peer into the future of selected children and offer them glimpses of the wonders ahead. But with that power come horrific visions of the turmoil and trouble the less fortunate among them are fated to suffer. Can Wendy and her stepfather prevent the suicide of Jamie Stratton in his teen years, as he grows up gay in a homophobic household and community? God the Father grants them three Thanksgiving visits to Jamie's tormentors, in hopes of bringing about a change of heart in them and eliminating their ingrained prejudices. Beyond the challenge of rescuing one precious child lies the far more daunting task of expunging entirely this brand of bigotry from the human race, as Santa and Wendy strive to remake the world in compassion and generosity. Along the way, they enlist the aid of the Easter Bunny, a highly persuasive fellow indeed. But the Tooth Fairy and her loathsome imps are hell-bent on doing all they can to stop Santa and Wendy-nay, to heighten mortal fear and hatred of anyone whose orientation strays even the slightest from the norm.


Book Synopsis Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes by : Robert Devereaux

Download or read book Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2011-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "I wish I could hope to ever attain one-thousandth the perversity of Robert Devereaux's toenail clippings." -Poppy Z. Brite Santa Claus is back. And flying beside him is Wendy, his freshly minted stepdaughter, who can peer into the future of selected children and offer them glimpses of the wonders ahead. But with that power come horrific visions of the turmoil and trouble the less fortunate among them are fated to suffer. Can Wendy and her stepfather prevent the suicide of Jamie Stratton in his teen years, as he grows up gay in a homophobic household and community? God the Father grants them three Thanksgiving visits to Jamie's tormentors, in hopes of bringing about a change of heart in them and eliminating their ingrained prejudices. Beyond the challenge of rescuing one precious child lies the far more daunting task of expunging entirely this brand of bigotry from the human race, as Santa and Wendy strive to remake the world in compassion and generosity. Along the way, they enlist the aid of the Easter Bunny, a highly persuasive fellow indeed. But the Tooth Fairy and her loathsome imps are hell-bent on doing all they can to stop Santa and Wendy-nay, to heighten mortal fear and hatred of anyone whose orientation strays even the slightest from the norm.


Are You Grumpy, Santa?

Are You Grumpy, Santa?

Author: Gregg Spiridellis

Publisher: Hyperion Books for Children

Published: 2008-09-16

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781423114994

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Sometimes even the merriest, most cheerful guy on the planet wakes up on the wrong side of the bed… First, after a restless night due to Mrs. Claus's snoring, Santa awakes on Christmas morning and stubs his toe. Then the elves shrink his suit, his sleigh gets buried in a snowdrift, and he gets stuck in a chimney. Santa’s had just about enough! But just in the nick of time, he discovers a very special gift of milk and cookies waiting for him. As he munches on the delicious snack, Santa's remembers what Christmas is all about—the gift of love—and, merrily, his grumpies melt away. Now available as a board book, this merrily irreverent Yuletide story, brought to life by Gregg and Evan Spiridellis, will tickle funny bones and touch hearts far and wide.


Book Synopsis Are You Grumpy, Santa? by : Gregg Spiridellis

Download or read book Are You Grumpy, Santa? written by Gregg Spiridellis and published by Hyperion Books for Children. This book was released on 2008-09-16 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sometimes even the merriest, most cheerful guy on the planet wakes up on the wrong side of the bed… First, after a restless night due to Mrs. Claus's snoring, Santa awakes on Christmas morning and stubs his toe. Then the elves shrink his suit, his sleigh gets buried in a snowdrift, and he gets stuck in a chimney. Santa’s had just about enough! But just in the nick of time, he discovers a very special gift of milk and cookies waiting for him. As he munches on the delicious snack, Santa's remembers what Christmas is all about—the gift of love—and, merrily, his grumpies melt away. Now available as a board book, this merrily irreverent Yuletide story, brought to life by Gregg and Evan Spiridellis, will tickle funny bones and touch hearts far and wide.


Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors (Adventures of the Bailey School Kids #3)

Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors (Adventures of the Bailey School Kids #3)

Author: Debbie Dadey

Publisher: Scholastic Inc.

Published: 2021-12-07

Total Pages: 61

ISBN-13: 1338829157

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The hugely popular early chapter book series re-emerges -- now in e-book! The kids in the third grade at Bailey Elementary are so hard to handle that all of their teachers have quit. But their new teacher, Mrs. Jeepers, is different to say the least. She's just moved from the Transylvanian Alps and she seems to have some strange powers that help her deal with these mischief-makers. Her methods may be a little unconventional, but, then again, Mrs. Jeepers may be just what the Bailey School kids need.


Book Synopsis Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors (Adventures of the Bailey School Kids #3) by : Debbie Dadey

Download or read book Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors (Adventures of the Bailey School Kids #3) written by Debbie Dadey and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2021-12-07 with total page 61 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The hugely popular early chapter book series re-emerges -- now in e-book! The kids in the third grade at Bailey Elementary are so hard to handle that all of their teachers have quit. But their new teacher, Mrs. Jeepers, is different to say the least. She's just moved from the Transylvanian Alps and she seems to have some strange powers that help her deal with these mischief-makers. Her methods may be a little unconventional, but, then again, Mrs. Jeepers may be just what the Bailey School kids need.


Santa Claus Saves the World

Santa Claus Saves the World

Author: Robert Devereaux

Publisher: Deadite Press

Published: 2013-12-01

Total Pages: 176

ISBN-13: 9781621051305

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It's that time of year again - when Santa Claus has to save the world! After conquering the homophobes, Santa Claus believes that humans can finally be nice instead of naughty. But dark forces from across history and mythology have other plans. One couple and their disintegrating marriage may just cause a chain reaction that will plunge the world into darkness and terror. So Santa and his pals begin an adventure from the North Pole to the Heaven and Hades to save the soul of humanity. Robert Devereaux returns once again to the Santa Mythos that made him an underground horror fan favorite. The sequel to "Santa Steps Out" and "Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes" combines pagan gods with holiday cheer and a large dose of sex and violence. "Santa Claus Saves the World" is a present for sickos of all-ages!


Book Synopsis Santa Claus Saves the World by : Robert Devereaux

Download or read book Santa Claus Saves the World written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2013-12-01 with total page 176 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's that time of year again - when Santa Claus has to save the world! After conquering the homophobes, Santa Claus believes that humans can finally be nice instead of naughty. But dark forces from across history and mythology have other plans. One couple and their disintegrating marriage may just cause a chain reaction that will plunge the world into darkness and terror. So Santa and his pals begin an adventure from the North Pole to the Heaven and Hades to save the soul of humanity. Robert Devereaux returns once again to the Santa Mythos that made him an underground horror fan favorite. The sequel to "Santa Steps Out" and "Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes" combines pagan gods with holiday cheer and a large dose of sex and violence. "Santa Claus Saves the World" is a present for sickos of all-ages!


Dear Santa, Please Come to the 19th Floor

Dear Santa, Please Come to the 19th Floor

Author: Yin

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2011-09-29

Total Pages: 44

ISBN-13: 1101650303

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Willy wants to cheer his best friend, Carlos, up. And what better way to do so than a Christmas visit from Santa Claus himself? But when Santa answers Willy's e-mail pleading with him to visit the 19th floor of their inner-city apartment building, he doesn't quite know what is in store for him. Yin and Chris Soentpiet, the author-illustrator pair who created the ALA notable Coolies, bring us a heartwarming and modern Christmas story with the lush illustrations that Soentpiet fans have come to love.


Book Synopsis Dear Santa, Please Come to the 19th Floor by : Yin

Download or read book Dear Santa, Please Come to the 19th Floor written by Yin and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2011-09-29 with total page 44 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Willy wants to cheer his best friend, Carlos, up. And what better way to do so than a Christmas visit from Santa Claus himself? But when Santa answers Willy's e-mail pleading with him to visit the 19th floor of their inner-city apartment building, he doesn't quite know what is in store for him. Yin and Chris Soentpiet, the author-illustrator pair who created the ALA notable Coolies, bring us a heartwarming and modern Christmas story with the lush illustrations that Soentpiet fans have come to love.


When Santa Fell to Earth

When Santa Fell to Earth

Author: Cornelia Funke

Publisher: Scholastic Inc.

Published: 2011-10-01

Total Pages: 182

ISBN-13: 054541511X

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A crash-landing puts Christmas in peril in this quirky, funny, and heartwarming holiday classic from the New York Times–bestselling author of Inkheart. Scared by a storm, Twinklestar, the least reliable reindeer, bolts—causing Santa and his sleigh to crash-land. And though Santa has dropped into a friendly neighborhood, he’s not safe: Jeremiah Goblynch, the ruthless new leader of the Council of Yuleland, is determined to put an end to children’s wishes and turn the holiday season into his own personal moneymaking scheme. As the last REAL St. Nick around, only Santa stands between Goblynch and his grinchlike plan. With the help and hope of kids Charlotte and Ben, Santa must face Goblynch and his Nutcracker goons to save Christmas! “Wonderfully imaginative details, adventure, danger, and a brave young Santa who fights to preserve all that is magical and special about Christmas make this a perfect read over a mug of hot chocolate on a cold winter’s night.” —School Library Journal “The humor, plus some unusual character types, sets this apart from the general run of holiday tales.” —Kirkus Reviews


Book Synopsis When Santa Fell to Earth by : Cornelia Funke

Download or read book When Santa Fell to Earth written by Cornelia Funke and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2011-10-01 with total page 182 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A crash-landing puts Christmas in peril in this quirky, funny, and heartwarming holiday classic from the New York Times–bestselling author of Inkheart. Scared by a storm, Twinklestar, the least reliable reindeer, bolts—causing Santa and his sleigh to crash-land. And though Santa has dropped into a friendly neighborhood, he’s not safe: Jeremiah Goblynch, the ruthless new leader of the Council of Yuleland, is determined to put an end to children’s wishes and turn the holiday season into his own personal moneymaking scheme. As the last REAL St. Nick around, only Santa stands between Goblynch and his grinchlike plan. With the help and hope of kids Charlotte and Ben, Santa must face Goblynch and his Nutcracker goons to save Christmas! “Wonderfully imaginative details, adventure, danger, and a brave young Santa who fights to preserve all that is magical and special about Christmas make this a perfect read over a mug of hot chocolate on a cold winter’s night.” —School Library Journal “The humor, plus some unusual character types, sets this apart from the general run of holiday tales.” —Kirkus Reviews


Santa Claws

Santa Claws

Author: Mary Conover Mellon Professor in the History of Architecture Nicholas Adams

Publisher: HarperPrism

Published: 1991-10-24

Total Pages: 196

ISBN-13: 9780061061080

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Cory is puzzled about how he had Chrissie's gold bracelet. There were no human footprints around Chrissie's body only animal prints.


Book Synopsis Santa Claws by : Mary Conover Mellon Professor in the History of Architecture Nicholas Adams

Download or read book Santa Claws written by Mary Conover Mellon Professor in the History of Architecture Nicholas Adams and published by HarperPrism. This book was released on 1991-10-24 with total page 196 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cory is puzzled about how he had Chrissie's gold bracelet. There were no human footprints around Chrissie's body only animal prints.


Santa Claus: The World's Number One Toy Expert

Santa Claus: The World's Number One Toy Expert

Author: Marla Frazee

Publisher: HarperCollins

Published: 2017-11-21

Total Pages: 32

ISBN-13: 1328470032

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How does Santa know how to match the exact right toy with the exact right kid every December? He knows because he's the world's number one kid and toy and gift expert, and he works long, long hours the whole year through, taking notes, compiling his research, thinking and testing and changing his mind. Then, at last, he gets it all figured out, and on Christmas morning, he makes magic happen. Celebrated author-illustrator Marla Frazee's fresh, lively take on a traditional subject is sure to become a favorite with young believers everywhere. With delicious humorous moments and a warm, unexpected ending, this book is truly a Christmas treat, one that begs to be read aloud and savored year after year.


Book Synopsis Santa Claus: The World's Number One Toy Expert by : Marla Frazee

Download or read book Santa Claus: The World's Number One Toy Expert written by Marla Frazee and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2017-11-21 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: How does Santa know how to match the exact right toy with the exact right kid every December? He knows because he's the world's number one kid and toy and gift expert, and he works long, long hours the whole year through, taking notes, compiling his research, thinking and testing and changing his mind. Then, at last, he gets it all figured out, and on Christmas morning, he makes magic happen. Celebrated author-illustrator Marla Frazee's fresh, lively take on a traditional subject is sure to become a favorite with young believers everywhere. With delicious humorous moments and a warm, unexpected ending, this book is truly a Christmas treat, one that begs to be read aloud and savored year after year.


The Writer's Guide to Weapons

The Writer's Guide to Weapons

Author: Benjamin Sobieck

Publisher: National Geographic Books

Published: 2015-07-09

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 1599638150

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When it comes to writing weapons, most authors shoot from the hip--and miss. The Writer's Guide to Weapons will help you hit your target every time. Firearms and knives have starring roles in a wide range of genres--crime, thriller, war, mystery, Western, and more. Unfortunately, many depictions of weapons in novels and film are pure fiction. Knowing the difference between a shotshell and a slug, a pistol and a revolver, or a switchblade and a butterfly knife is essential for imbuing your story with authenticity--and gaining popularity with discerning readers. Inside you'll find: • An in-depth look at the basics of firearms and knives: how they work, why they work, what they look like, and how to depict them accurately in your stories. • The biggest weapons myths in fiction, TV, and film. • A surefire guide for choosing the correct weapon for your characters, no matter their skill level, strength, or background. • A review of major gun and knife laws, weapons safety tips,and common police tactics. • "The Hit List," showcasing the most popular weapons for spies, detectives, gunslingers, gangsters, military characters, and more. • Examples highlighting inaccurate vs. accurate weapons depictions. • An insightful foreword by David Morrell, the award-winning creator of Rambo. Equal parts accessible, humorous, and practical, The Writer's Guide to Weapons is the one resource you need to incorporate firearms and knives into your fiction like a seasoned professional.


Book Synopsis The Writer's Guide to Weapons by : Benjamin Sobieck

Download or read book The Writer's Guide to Weapons written by Benjamin Sobieck and published by National Geographic Books. This book was released on 2015-07-09 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When it comes to writing weapons, most authors shoot from the hip--and miss. The Writer's Guide to Weapons will help you hit your target every time. Firearms and knives have starring roles in a wide range of genres--crime, thriller, war, mystery, Western, and more. Unfortunately, many depictions of weapons in novels and film are pure fiction. Knowing the difference between a shotshell and a slug, a pistol and a revolver, or a switchblade and a butterfly knife is essential for imbuing your story with authenticity--and gaining popularity with discerning readers. Inside you'll find: • An in-depth look at the basics of firearms and knives: how they work, why they work, what they look like, and how to depict them accurately in your stories. • The biggest weapons myths in fiction, TV, and film. • A surefire guide for choosing the correct weapon for your characters, no matter their skill level, strength, or background. • A review of major gun and knife laws, weapons safety tips,and common police tactics. • "The Hit List," showcasing the most popular weapons for spies, detectives, gunslingers, gangsters, military characters, and more. • Examples highlighting inaccurate vs. accurate weapons depictions. • An insightful foreword by David Morrell, the award-winning creator of Rambo. Equal parts accessible, humorous, and practical, The Writer's Guide to Weapons is the one resource you need to incorporate firearms and knives into your fiction like a seasoned professional.